Isn’t Everything Supposed To Go Right?

Isn’t everything supposed to go right? I mean, not everything goes right- I get that. And I know that life is full of ups and downs. 

But when you have a child, you assume things will go right- at least, that was my assumption when I had children.

And I suppose, there could always be (way in the back of your mind) the worry that something wouldn’t go (or be) “right” but we continue on with life and kind of forget about that worry.

But then, something happens. Something unexpected and not “right”. 

For me, that something was a diagnosis. A heart-stopping, beat-you-to-the-ground kind of diagnosis. My youngest son was given a diagnosis of Autism- when he was two years old.

Maybe you’ve experienced something similar. Or maybe it wasn’t a diagnosis of Autism, but one of a medical condition, or anxiety, or any kind of “something” that made you stop everything, and re-think everything about your life or your child’s life. 

You know what happened to me when I experienced the “not right”? I focused on a plan- I over-focused. I started doing anything and everything I could do help him. I stayed up late at night to research. I poured over articles for hours to get glimpses of information. I fought hard to get him ABA (Applied Behavior Analysis) as soon as possible through Early Intervention. I even sat in on ABA sessions when he was two years old so that I could learn as much as I could-  putting my older son (only 3 1/2 at the time) on the computer to play a game or watch a movie so that I could attend. I found out about natural treatments for Autism such as diet changes and addressing food allergies and sensitivities. My son and ways to help him became the focus of my life- for over 10 years.

So- for all of you reading this right now that are thinking “Hey- that’s me!” 

I get it. I hear you. I was there.  

But here’s the thing. When I brought my son to Brain Fit Academy, and started attending classes myself (as I talk about in some of my other blog posts) I learned about just how much I was over-focusing. I learned that being so focused on one thing, one situation, one person, isn’t the best thing to do.  I came to realize just how much stress I was putting myself under and how that wasn’t allowing me to see the “big picture”.

  • Do we have times in our lives where we may need to put all our effort into one thing for awhile? Yes, of course.  
  • Do we have times in our lives when we need help or we may need to seek help for our children? Yes, absolutely. 
  • Do we all want what is best for our children? Who could deny that? 

But if that over-focusing- that head-first, “into the fire” type of behavior continues, it can be the detriment of all around us.

When Brain Fit came into my life, did it help my son? Yes, for sure. Did it help me? Absolutely.

Now, I’m more balanced in my day to day life. I’m better able to put things in perspective and I remember to take care of myself too.

Is my life perfect? No- is it ever, really for anyone? But it is better. It’s easier for me, it’s easier for my son, and it’s easier for the rest of my family. 

Apparently, not everything goes right. But with some help, with some understanding and learning and support, things can be better, can get better, and everyone will be better off for it.

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